Yes, that’s it. The script for Company. I have not posted here in a while, because I suck. But you knew that already. Anyway. So, longish story shorter – I was cast as Bobby in the Playhouse Merced Production of Company. I KNOW!!! Right? The show opens Feb 12 and runs through the 28th right here in Merced in 2010. I should have been posting about the auditions, the intrigue, the tension, the drama, the…well…shoulda woulda coulda. I didn’t. But, I plan on trying to capture the process, the path, the way forward as we begin the Company production. I missed posting about the auditions, casting, etc. and I may go back and try to fill in some of that…but I probably won’t. I used “Not a Day Goes By” as my audition song, which is the first time I have sung that song as an audition piece, even though I love it dearly. I thought it was a good choice, capturing some of the conflicting emotions and pathos that seems to underlie Bobby and well, without overanalyzing stuff too much, I think I rocked it. I made one of the auditioners cry, which you know, you can’t really complain about.  But I digress.

So…the scripts became available today and I wasted no time getting my hot little hands on mine. #3. Corey Strauss (Paul) and Dianne Kocher (Amy) were #1 and #2. Did I mention I was Bobby? I did? oh. Well I am Bobby! so suck it.

I cannot believe I get to sing “Being Alive” on stage in an actual production. This is somewhat like when I got to be Daniel in “Once on this Island” but better. Sondheim Mother F*ckers! Unbelievably awesome and scary as all get out. Bobby in Company is one of those “before-I-die-I-want-to-play-this-part” roles for me and I am so unbelievably excited that I get to actually do it. I am also really intimidated by the part, and mixed with my excitement is a numbing fear and really really high level of “what the hell, there is no way I can pull this off, what in the effin hell was I and every other person thinking” kind of thing going on. Too late. I am it and I am determined to just wallow in the awesomeness that is this incredibly challenging, incredibly beautiful, incredibly incredible role.

Monday. Monday. Monday. First rehearsal, read-through. Monday. Two days. AIEEEEE. I cannot, I am just, I don’t know what to, I….I get to be this person! Pinch me. Sock the sh*t out of me. ‘Cause it just ain’t real. With all the other random bullsh*t going on, and with all the second-guessing, and mid-life crisis-ey, what the hell has my life come to stuff going on, there is this thing – this amazing, unbelievable, exciting, scary, soaring beautiful thing I get to do. I am, also,  going to rock the hell out of it.

I cracked open the script, read through it, marked it up, highlighted it (in erasable colored pencil, don’t freak out) checked the vocal range, tabbed it, labeled it. Pondered it. Sh*t. I can’t wait, and I am ready, and I am so not ready. Heh. Initial thoughts, I am looking forward to everything, but I am not fool – this is some really challenging acting and some really challenging music and some really challenging thinking. I will post further about all of the different things, the rehearsals, the concepts, the motivation, the tribulations, the triumphs, the whatever. Bobby, you rudderless, connection-phobic, living through other peoples connections, random-ass playboy manchild, 70’s archetype person – I love you. Now I need to be you, to inhabit you and decode you. I am ready, and I am so not ready at the same time – hey! I already getting into the Bobby frame. More to come.